I'm completely torn over this entire Syria thing, seriously confused. I go back and forth on a daily basis between supporting it and not, sometimes many times in one day. Usually I'm able to see things like this for what they are, I'm not quite sure what's different about this one but there IS something different. Here's the breakdown...
THE HEAD:
Ok of course my head is screaming NO to war. I mean what sort of person is ok with sending strangers out into the war to kill and possibly be killed? It's one thing to sit and watch on television things happening in some middle east country, and it's one thing to know American soldiers are out there...I guess until/unless it's your child out there, your husband/wife, your brother or sister, you just don't appreciate everything they do, what they give up. I only can appreciate it via history, knowing my Grandpa was a WW2 hero (the captured U-Boat, the U505, he was part of that. I have the photos of it, of him standing on it) and even though he's really my step-grandfather, my life would have been LESS were he not here, if he would have been killed. He came damned close to dying, the first ship he was on was hit and sunk, he floated in the Atlantic for quite a long time before being rescued. He lost most of the hearing in his one ear from sea water getting in there and causing a massive infection. For me the thought of my hero, the man who hung the moon, floating around in that huge ocean where sharks live and were feasting on the less fortunate...it makes me have heart palpitations and not in that "James Purefoy was naked in ROME" sort of way either. It makes my eyes tear up, it gives me that squishy-in-the-guts feeling. My grandpa was my world, my childhood would have been a disaster without him. I wouldn't be here were it not for him because the things I had to survive...well I'm getting off course here. Anyway...so yes my head says NO to war. War is never good, it should never be an answer to anything. There should always be ways around going to war. It's one thing to go to war if your country has been attacked, of course you cannot just let that happen, of course you have to answer that act of aggression with an act of aggression that teaches the original aggressor who's boss. WW2, we got bombed so we got into it...Pearl Harbor. Of course I always have wondered if we would have gotten into WW2 when we knew what Hitler was up to, even just a hint, how many people wouldn't have been tortured and slaughtered just for being Jewish? For supporting someone who's Jewish? Polish? Gypsy? A free-thinker? Well we'll never know. It's easy to look BACK and say we should have gone in earlier, but back then I'm not convinced the President knew to the extent what was going on in Europe, had he known I believe he would have done something. I've seen many programs on WW2 and Hitler that I know our troops were utterly shocked beyond belief when they did walk into those first few concentration camps at what they saw, at the conditions, at the death staring them in the eyes. I thank god my Grandpa was in the Navy and not on the ground, that he never went into one of those concentration camps. My son's great grandparents were "guests" at a concentration camp for a couple of years, for nothing more than being Polish and being part of the Polish Army. I cannot imagine what they saw, my heart has always bled for them. I believe that President Obama is worried that another Holocaust is happening in Syria, we know for sure people have been killed using chemical warfare. That's always been the red line in the sand, for the world, but my head still tells me NO WAR. Let them deal with it, let them rise up and fight and overcome this evil Assad the Dictator.
However....
THE HEART:
My heart, oh it bleeds for the Syrian people. The horrific photo's of dead babies and children will haunt me just as deeply as the photo's of the dead Jewish people back in WW2. They will follow me all my days on this earth. How mankind can be so cruel to each other, especially to innocent children, well it scars my soul. My heart wants us to help these people, these men, women and children that are being slaughtered and I am incredibly afraid that this IS the beginning of another holocaust. If we don't do it, if we don't go help these people, who will? Someone HAS to help them! If this were happening here, if our children were dying in the dirt because an evil man made the decision to gas them and we weren't the powerful nation that we are, wouldn't we want someone out there to come here and help us? Help our children? Our people? My heart wants us out there yesterday gathering the orphaned children, make sure they get the help they need and maybe the family as well. We have a huge heart here in America. It's what we do. But there is history, 9/11, Iraq, Afghanistan, being lied to by the former regime of Bush and Cheney, 2 wars that went on for to damned long, one that is still going on...America is war weary and while our hearts scream for justice for these people, for these children, we also want our service men and women safe. They have fought hard, long and enough. See even when it comes to the heart, the head gets involved. That's never a bad thing to be honest.
I do trust the President, I believe he would never get us involved in something that was unnecessary, that he'd never lie to get his way, but.....but.....see my problem? We know for certain that chemical warfare was used on the Syrian people, the tests of dirt prove it, and that makes me angry. But there is just something in my guts that tell me not this one, not this one, not now and not this one. I think it's the threat of Russia and Iran and possibly China getting involved and not in a "lets support America" way either and that scares me to the soul. Especially China. America is great, our armed forces are second to none...well OK maybe to China and that's my problem. The Chinese army is massive, and trained in a way that gives me nightmares. This could be the beginning of the end of everything. I want President Obama to tell me that China will not get involved, that Russia isn't the power they were back in the day, that we can do what needs to be done and that's it. But life doesn't come with guarantees does it? You're damned if you do and damned if you don't and this time being damned could be literally. I always panic and think END OF THE WORLD but it scares me. I didn't bring my beloved son into this world to be part of the end of it. He has a bright future ahead of him, he's just begun high school, he's coming into his own and he has grandiose plans for his life and the determination to make them all come to pass...he should have that chance. Especially when you understand the trust he has in the President.
In the end it's not my decision, in the end I think President Obama will do what has to be done and vocally I'll support him and who knows, maybe both my head and heart will agree, but as of right now? I'm warring within myself.
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