26 November 2011
I Promise!!!
I will be back with new thoughts and stuff! Just been busy with the holiday's and shopping and life!
08 November 2011
Election Night 2011
Lizzy Muransky: "It's been a good night!! Maybe American's are waking up to reality after all!"
It really takes so little to make me clap! Anyhoo....tonight's been a good night politically for the good ol' US of A! Now I'm a Liberal, I was raised a Liberal *yes, with a capitol L* by my grandfather and I am raising my son Liberal. He may actually be more Liberal than me...anyhow tonight 3 big bills were voted down. The biggest for me was in Mississippi where the conservatives were trying to say life begins at fertilization and was trying to put a "personhood" bill through, completely taking away a woman's choice to not only do what she sees fit for herself but would also severely limit birth control and make it hard for women to be artificially inseminated in order to become mothers. Now I was worried most about this I'll admit because I'm a woman and I believe when something this vile is made law in one state it is just a matter of time before it takes over the country. There are men (read republican) who believe abortion should be made a criminal offense and not just illegal, even in the case of a young girl having been raped and resulting in a most unwanted pregnancy and where it endangers a woman's life, and I'm always left wondering WHO THE FUCK gave them a right to have an opinion on this at all? Have they suddenly grown a uterus and nobody told me? It's hilarious that conservatives are so PRO LIFE when it comes to an unborn fetus but once that fetus is out in the world, a breathing child, if they're not rich they want nothing to do with that child anymore. They don't want to make sure it's fed, clothed, sheltered or educated. AND these people are almost unanimously PRO DEATH PENALTY!!! That just blows my mind altogether.
The second big win came from Ohio, who voted NO to a union busting amendment. I swear to gershwin I felt my grandfather spinning in his grave at the conservatives taking away union worker's rights! A union man his entire life, this would have been something that would have made him protest, I swear. I can just see him downtown Chicago with a big old sign protesting that silly bill! He's smiling now though, I just know it.
Third happened in Maine where they can again register and vote on the same day. Some wacky conservatives decided that it would be cool to take that law away from Americans in hopes of what I just don't know...maybe they hoped it would lead to more votes come 2012 in their favour? Who knows.
Earlier tonight I was talking with my PJ about the state this country is in and how conservatives are always screaming for LESS GOVERNMENT and if you vote for them that's exactly what you'll get when in reality what you'll get voting for them is way MORE government in your life and much higher taxes unless you're uber-rich. I don't care how they spin it, Reagan was wrong with his trickle down economics because the rich do NOT create more jobs when they pay less in taxes, if this were correct after all those massive Bush tax cuts for the filthy rich would have created massive amounts of jobs however...and ya knew there'd be one of those...in the end we ended up in a recession not seen since the depression and they're blaming that on President Obama, who wasn't even in office when it began. It's frightening how many people don't know how to do simple math, the recession started in 2007, President Obama was elected...that's right ELECTED, not sworn in...in 2008 and then took actual control of the country in January of 2009. But I suppose conservatives don't like to get into those pesky details. Whatever. Now I'm not saying Mr. Obama has been a perfect President, there have been times I've had to shake my head in disagreement with him (Afghanistan comes to mind) but for the most part I think he's done a good job...with what he's had to work with anyway. If the republicans weren't so, literally, hell-bent on defeating every fucking thing he's tried to do so far, this country would be well into recovery instead of limping towards it. It's absolutely fucking amazing that these moron's stand up there, proud as can be, and will look into the camera and say they will do EVERYTHING in their power to make sure President Obama is a one term President! And from the looks of things that absolutely includes throwing this country into a depression! The American people have to wake up and see these asshats for what they are, and they have to stop drinking the Fox News Kool Aid and realise that there is not ONE republican candidate that has any plans on adding one job or helping middle America because they simply DO NOT CARE about middle America. They only care about themselves and their bank accounts and what will keep the money flowing freely into those accounts. I mean look at how Faux News is spinning all these accusations that are out there against Herman Cain! A couple months ago when Mr. Weiner (really needs to change his name imo) was texting photo's of his schwangy these conservative warmongers were foaming at the mouth, screaming for first his head and then his resignation but with Mr. Cain? It's the women's fault and those of us women who do not wish to be sexually abused should wear Burka's, that's their take on it all. I mean seriously?! Rush Limbaugh (who my beloved son calls Limbog or Limba the Hutt) is the most vile excuse for a human being out there and he's even going after one of the women's young son, insulting him! WHERE is the line with these vermon? Do they have one? Is that BLACK MAN in the WHITE HOUSE that threatening to them that they'll take an obvious sexual predator and back him to become the republican candidate next year? Really? Unbelievable. Really unbelievable. And I thought Rick Perry was the worst of that lot! He's just pill popping and beer slurping now days! Jebus these people need to get a grip on their slimy souls and take a good, hard look at what they're saying and doing! And STOP comparing these accusations against Cain to Clinton and Monica Lewinsky who was a WILLING PARTICIPANT. That is worlds apart! Give me Bill Clinton and that cigar any fucking day over Herman Cain and his roving hands! GAH I just made myself throw up in my mouth a little bit...nope.... A LOT.....excuse me whilst I rush to the loo... ;o)
Anyway today was a good day, it really does seem that Americans are waking up, smelling the tea and deciding they'd rather have coffee!!
29 October 2011
Paranormal Activity 3
So ok, I've seen all 3 of the PA films now, the third one I went and saw at the cinema. I didn't see the other 2 at the cinema, I was much smarter I guess. I thought the third one was a bit confusing, my son and I had to talk about it for a while before we really got the gist of what we saw but in the end we both agreed, it scared the shit out of us! I've gotta say this is truly a frightening trilogy!! Scary enough for me to NEVER own them! lol Remember, that's my rule, anything that scares me like that will never grace my dvd shelves! Speaking of films that scare the shit outta me, non other than the woman who scared me as a child more than any other human being in the world is in Chicago, and I just adore her! Linda Blair is here in Chicago, there are 2 cinema's showing The Exorcist this weekend and she's going to both places for 1 showing! I'd so love to sit in the dark to watch that film but I'd be afraid to like scream and embarrass myself in front of her! I think she's gorgeous and has not aged and I just adore her for all the hard, hard work she does for animal shelters! I long ago made the decision to get any and all of my fur babies from shelters only, and donate food or supplies whenever my bank account lets me, which is sadly not very often. I always thought it would be such a great idea for shelters to "rent" out dog stalls, for certain amounts of time, where people then support whatever animal is living there until he/she is adopted. I have it all worked out in my head but am too tired to type it out now, but I think it would be a pretty popular program and it would take a lot of pressure off of facilities that have no real choice but to be shelters that put animal's down after a certain amount of time. Have it be rentable by week or month or even by year, set certain amounts that will cover food and litter (for cats obviously) and maybe even a program where the person who is "renting" the stall can come in once a week or so to spend some time cleaning it and taking care of the dog or cat. I know I'd do it, I can't volunteer because I have quite the crazy schedule but I'd be able to go at least once a week to help out like that. And I could maybe "rent" a stall one week and skip a couple 'cos it's that time when all my bills are due and then pick up a couple more weeks later. I dunno, I suppose that would be hard to work out and there are always people who would sign up for things like that and not go through with it but really, for the most part I think it could work. Better brains than mine would have to work it out, I had hard enough time just coming up with the idea! lol
27 October 2011
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Today, 27th October 2011, marks the 53rd birthday of a man who graced my bedroom walls, ceiling, my high school locker, books, notebooks, starred in many, many angsty teenaged romantical stories and still, some 30 years later, can trip my heart fantastic. Why today is non other than
SIMON LEBON'S BIRTHDAY!!!
The man who taught me what lust was and continues to describe masculinity for me! lol Seriously, at 53 he makes me wobble like a schoolgirl and who doesn't like to feel young again? I adore this man and I seriously hope he had a wonderful birthday and continues rockin' not only my world but everybody's world! I swear the world would just suck if it wasn't for Simon Lebon and Duran Duran!!!
SIMON LEBON'S BIRTHDAY!!!
The man who taught me what lust was and continues to describe masculinity for me! lol Seriously, at 53 he makes me wobble like a schoolgirl and who doesn't like to feel young again? I adore this man and I seriously hope he had a wonderful birthday and continues rockin' not only my world but everybody's world! I swear the world would just suck if it wasn't for Simon Lebon and Duran Duran!!!
23 October 2011
Just wanted to say...
On the 23rd day of October in the year Nineteen Hundred ninety eight, at 3:23pm, my beautiful son was born. Not a day has gone by that I haven't loved him more than the day before.
17 October 2011
Things that make me HAPPY
I was gonna blog about things that annoy me, there are so many, but instead I figured I'd blog about something that makes me happy. There is this one that makes me so happy I feel that I could just burst and his name is PJ. He's my 13 year old son. Well ok he's 12 but he's turning 13 Sunday.
When I was first married my then husband and I had a hard time getting pregnant, to the point that I'd given up. I didn't want to go the fertility pill route or anything more drastic than that, there's nothing wrong with it but it just wasn't for me. For me I figured if I was meant to have a kid it would happen and since it wasn't...well that was a pretty clear answer. I gave up. I even got used to the idea of not having children and I figured that the pro's for it was that I'd have ultimate freedom. No worries. No stress and no responsibility. Of course that's exactly when I got pregnant and the second I found out all that other stuff was just bullshit. I remember we'd just moved into our townhouse, I'd just finished painting the entire thing myself and I began feeling not normal. I remember buying the pregnancy test, it was a special 2 for 1 sale, and the girl behind the counter smiled and asked me what I wanted the results to be, I said negative. I actually believed that too. I was utterly convinced I was ok with being childless for the rest of my life. I didn't tell my husband that I'd bought the test, I didn't want to get his hopes up for nothing and I was convinced it was going to be negative. Well sorta. There was this little, tiny voice telling me that this was the test that was going to change the rest of my life in ways I could not imagine. At this time we had a new puppy and my husband was getting up @5am to let her outside to do her thang so I figured I'd go take the test. It only takes a few minutes to get the results and when I saw the 2 lines I nearly passed out! I kept rubbing my eyes, figuring I was sleeping or something and when my husband came upstairs I asked him if he saw 1 or 2 lines and when he said TWO? I cried and told him he was going to be a daddy. Thing was I was BARELY pregnant, when I went to the doctor (after taking FIVE pregnancy tests) and was asked when I'd last had my period I said the prior month I got a look. Then the doctor came in and she asked me why in the world I would think I was pregnant when I wasn't even really concidered late for my period that month, I just had a feeling I told her, plus 5 pregnancy tests. She laughed and took blood for a definitive test and said she'd call the next day. I was at work the next day and I told them that any calls for me I was to be immediately notified so I could take it. The call came at just after 6pm and the nurse said, "We don't know how you knew but yes, you're pregnant. Barely 2 weeks but the test came out positive. Congratulations." and I just cried. My boss was quite concerned and when I told him he gave me a hug and the rest of the night off.
My pregnancy was uneventful thank god, I didn't even vomit once but was really tired almost the entire first trimester. I mean not being able to work tired 'cos I was falling asleep standing tired. That's pretty damned tired! I got through it though. One thing I remember from the pregnancy test morning was waiting for 7am so I could call my mother and tell her she was FINALLY going to be a grandmother. She laughed and said just the day before at work she'd said she gave up on ever being a grandma...little did she know! So my pregnancy went well, the ultrasound was a hoot 'cos he just laid there and showed his winky so we'd know he was a he...made the tech laugh. "He really wants you to know he's a boy." He said. I was thrilled because if I had to be honest? I soooo wanted a boy! Being a tomboy my entire life I was unsure I'd be able to raise a girly girl and was utterly convinced (and still am) that I'd have had a girly girl. So I had a boy, 23rd October 1998 at 3:23pm, he weighed 7lbs 9oz and measured in at a whopping 23 inches long. They didn't show him to me right away, he was a c-section because when I'd had a late pregnancy ultrasound he seemed to be well over 10 pounds so we'd planned the c-section. However we didn't plan for me to bleed out. I have absolutely no memory of this, I didn't even learn of this for the next 2 years until friends of ours had their first baby and my husband told me! Personally I think it was the doctor's job to tell me I nearly fucking died giving birth! So I had PJ and an hour later when they put him in my arms...I looked at the face of the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen in my entire life. My baby boy. Instantly and without a doubt I was in love. There was nothing I'd not do for this baby, nothing I wouldn't protect him from and I'd always be in his corner. I never knew such a love could even exist, I understood my own mother in a second in a way I couldn't have until I held my own child. There is nothing like the love a mother has for her child.
As PJ grew that love grew of course, I watched the baby turn into a toddler with enough personality for 12 toddlers and then I watched that toddler turn into a kid. I'd say he was an average, normal American kid but my PJ has never been average or normal a day in his life and I've not raised him to reach for that. He is exceptional. To me. To his family. When he was little and didn't know a word for what he was feeling he'd just make one up. He was never hungry, he was empty. He was never thirsty, he was drinky. He was a ham, a comedian and a poet at 3 years old when he'd take his dad's microphone and sing lyrics he was making up as he went, and his mom was on the sofa writing it all down. I have to say some of what he said was beyond his years, way beyond. When he was 7 he wrote 3 songs that I still have, that contained emotions that should have been well beyond him. One song in particular made my heart ache. He's always been artistic and I always thought that he'd be a musician but at 6 years old he discovered Star Wars, George Lucas and movies. Since then, even though he wrote poems/lyrics, he was determined to be the next George Lucas. He's been writing his own sci-fi show or film (he's not decided which yet) since he was 6 years old and the things he's come up with? Massive. I find it impossible that the person I gave life to was this talented. I always knew he was special. He's turning 13 in less than a week and plans on going to university, he's torn between Columbia College here in Chicago and Northwestern University, which is said to have an excellent film program. He is determined to be a huge star, a movie star first and then a director. However he says if the acting doesn't work for him he won't be that upset, he'll just make films. I look at this young man, puberty has taken him over in the past year, growing him over 6 inches, deepening his voice, putting hair where there wasn't hair a year ago, and am amazed at how utterly convinced he is of his future. How hard he works towards his future. For Christmas I'm buying him a video camera, put his feet well and truly on the road to success.
To say I'm proud of my child is ridiculous because it goes much further than that. He's a good kid, a good person with a huge heart, a brain he uses and the ability to meld the two...something most adults cannot do. He's more politically savvy than 99% of the adults around him, has his own opinions on everything from religion to politics to what we're gonna have for dinner and no, McDonalds is not happening tonight. :o) He is a most impressive young man, I'm not nearly as together at 44 as he is at nearly 13 and it's just not fair! lol I mean I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up!
So I sit here and look at this beautiful creature that I'm told is my son and my entire being is filled with an emotion so much stronger than love that there isn't a word strong enough to describe it. How I've raised him as well as I have is a marvel, because I'd never have believed 13 years ago that I would be a good mom much less the best mom in the world (PJz words, not mine)! He's not perfect, nobody is, but in my eyes he's as close to perfection than any human being has a right to be. I'm proud of myself that he's not afraid to tell me everything going on in his life, that's going on in his head, and sometimes it's hard to hear. He's just like most kids who are different, he's gone through being bullied but now since he's so big everyone leaves him alone, but he remembers how it hurt to be bullied and he refuses to let anyone around him be bullied. I saw online today that a beautiful teenage boy killed himself last Friday, because he was gay and felt he had nobody, that is the last thing I want for my son, to feel alone like that. My heart cries for that boy because he was wrong, it DOES get better. We've mostly all been there, felt that pain, been bullied, and we got through it. I'm not making any judgement on his parents, my heart hurts for their loss, I just wish he knew they'd understand and would have done anything to help him. I've told my PJ since he was a toddler that there is nothing that the two of us cannot make it through, that I'm always in his corner, that I'd fight for him until the day I die and beyond. I mean I've pounded this into his skull over and over again and when in fifth grade he came to me because the bullying had gotten so bad he was considering suicide, he saw how fierce his mom is in defending him. At the end of that school year he had enough confidence to push the bully onto his ass and to tell him if he ever gets in his face again he'll get worse than being pushed onto his ass, the kid believed him and has not even looked at him wrong since. I cannot even allow myself to think what would have happened 2 years ago if he didn't know to come to me when he was being bullied because I'd help him, and I refuse to allow myself to go there. He made it through that. He doesn't care over much for Lady Gaga's music, a few songs here and there he likes, but he says he appreciates how she stands up for kids who are being bullied and how strong of a message she has for them. He's convinced she's saved more lives than she'll ever know about. I love Lady Gaga for fighting for kids like my son, who are bullied, and don't have someone in their corner to fight for them. Plus she makes some good, butt-wiggling music too!
So here's PJ, in 7th grade, taller than me with a voice as deep as his dad's. I look at him and am filled with pride, love and awe. I birthed me a beautiful baby boy who is turning himself into a spectacular human being and that I will not take responsibility for because whilst I may have laid the ground-work for it, he's done the hard work, made the right decisions and continues to try to be the best person he knows how to be. He doesn't care who sees him hug me in public, kiss my cheek in public and say I love you in public...I'm his mom and he loves me and wants the world to know it. How lucky am I?!!
When I was first married my then husband and I had a hard time getting pregnant, to the point that I'd given up. I didn't want to go the fertility pill route or anything more drastic than that, there's nothing wrong with it but it just wasn't for me. For me I figured if I was meant to have a kid it would happen and since it wasn't...well that was a pretty clear answer. I gave up. I even got used to the idea of not having children and I figured that the pro's for it was that I'd have ultimate freedom. No worries. No stress and no responsibility. Of course that's exactly when I got pregnant and the second I found out all that other stuff was just bullshit. I remember we'd just moved into our townhouse, I'd just finished painting the entire thing myself and I began feeling not normal. I remember buying the pregnancy test, it was a special 2 for 1 sale, and the girl behind the counter smiled and asked me what I wanted the results to be, I said negative. I actually believed that too. I was utterly convinced I was ok with being childless for the rest of my life. I didn't tell my husband that I'd bought the test, I didn't want to get his hopes up for nothing and I was convinced it was going to be negative. Well sorta. There was this little, tiny voice telling me that this was the test that was going to change the rest of my life in ways I could not imagine. At this time we had a new puppy and my husband was getting up @5am to let her outside to do her thang so I figured I'd go take the test. It only takes a few minutes to get the results and when I saw the 2 lines I nearly passed out! I kept rubbing my eyes, figuring I was sleeping or something and when my husband came upstairs I asked him if he saw 1 or 2 lines and when he said TWO? I cried and told him he was going to be a daddy. Thing was I was BARELY pregnant, when I went to the doctor (after taking FIVE pregnancy tests) and was asked when I'd last had my period I said the prior month I got a look. Then the doctor came in and she asked me why in the world I would think I was pregnant when I wasn't even really concidered late for my period that month, I just had a feeling I told her, plus 5 pregnancy tests. She laughed and took blood for a definitive test and said she'd call the next day. I was at work the next day and I told them that any calls for me I was to be immediately notified so I could take it. The call came at just after 6pm and the nurse said, "We don't know how you knew but yes, you're pregnant. Barely 2 weeks but the test came out positive. Congratulations." and I just cried. My boss was quite concerned and when I told him he gave me a hug and the rest of the night off.
My pregnancy was uneventful thank god, I didn't even vomit once but was really tired almost the entire first trimester. I mean not being able to work tired 'cos I was falling asleep standing tired. That's pretty damned tired! I got through it though. One thing I remember from the pregnancy test morning was waiting for 7am so I could call my mother and tell her she was FINALLY going to be a grandmother. She laughed and said just the day before at work she'd said she gave up on ever being a grandma...little did she know! So my pregnancy went well, the ultrasound was a hoot 'cos he just laid there and showed his winky so we'd know he was a he...made the tech laugh. "He really wants you to know he's a boy." He said. I was thrilled because if I had to be honest? I soooo wanted a boy! Being a tomboy my entire life I was unsure I'd be able to raise a girly girl and was utterly convinced (and still am) that I'd have had a girly girl. So I had a boy, 23rd October 1998 at 3:23pm, he weighed 7lbs 9oz and measured in at a whopping 23 inches long. They didn't show him to me right away, he was a c-section because when I'd had a late pregnancy ultrasound he seemed to be well over 10 pounds so we'd planned the c-section. However we didn't plan for me to bleed out. I have absolutely no memory of this, I didn't even learn of this for the next 2 years until friends of ours had their first baby and my husband told me! Personally I think it was the doctor's job to tell me I nearly fucking died giving birth! So I had PJ and an hour later when they put him in my arms...I looked at the face of the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen in my entire life. My baby boy. Instantly and without a doubt I was in love. There was nothing I'd not do for this baby, nothing I wouldn't protect him from and I'd always be in his corner. I never knew such a love could even exist, I understood my own mother in a second in a way I couldn't have until I held my own child. There is nothing like the love a mother has for her child.
As PJ grew that love grew of course, I watched the baby turn into a toddler with enough personality for 12 toddlers and then I watched that toddler turn into a kid. I'd say he was an average, normal American kid but my PJ has never been average or normal a day in his life and I've not raised him to reach for that. He is exceptional. To me. To his family. When he was little and didn't know a word for what he was feeling he'd just make one up. He was never hungry, he was empty. He was never thirsty, he was drinky. He was a ham, a comedian and a poet at 3 years old when he'd take his dad's microphone and sing lyrics he was making up as he went, and his mom was on the sofa writing it all down. I have to say some of what he said was beyond his years, way beyond. When he was 7 he wrote 3 songs that I still have, that contained emotions that should have been well beyond him. One song in particular made my heart ache. He's always been artistic and I always thought that he'd be a musician but at 6 years old he discovered Star Wars, George Lucas and movies. Since then, even though he wrote poems/lyrics, he was determined to be the next George Lucas. He's been writing his own sci-fi show or film (he's not decided which yet) since he was 6 years old and the things he's come up with? Massive. I find it impossible that the person I gave life to was this talented. I always knew he was special. He's turning 13 in less than a week and plans on going to university, he's torn between Columbia College here in Chicago and Northwestern University, which is said to have an excellent film program. He is determined to be a huge star, a movie star first and then a director. However he says if the acting doesn't work for him he won't be that upset, he'll just make films. I look at this young man, puberty has taken him over in the past year, growing him over 6 inches, deepening his voice, putting hair where there wasn't hair a year ago, and am amazed at how utterly convinced he is of his future. How hard he works towards his future. For Christmas I'm buying him a video camera, put his feet well and truly on the road to success.
To say I'm proud of my child is ridiculous because it goes much further than that. He's a good kid, a good person with a huge heart, a brain he uses and the ability to meld the two...something most adults cannot do. He's more politically savvy than 99% of the adults around him, has his own opinions on everything from religion to politics to what we're gonna have for dinner and no, McDonalds is not happening tonight. :o) He is a most impressive young man, I'm not nearly as together at 44 as he is at nearly 13 and it's just not fair! lol I mean I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up!
So I sit here and look at this beautiful creature that I'm told is my son and my entire being is filled with an emotion so much stronger than love that there isn't a word strong enough to describe it. How I've raised him as well as I have is a marvel, because I'd never have believed 13 years ago that I would be a good mom much less the best mom in the world (PJz words, not mine)! He's not perfect, nobody is, but in my eyes he's as close to perfection than any human being has a right to be. I'm proud of myself that he's not afraid to tell me everything going on in his life, that's going on in his head, and sometimes it's hard to hear. He's just like most kids who are different, he's gone through being bullied but now since he's so big everyone leaves him alone, but he remembers how it hurt to be bullied and he refuses to let anyone around him be bullied. I saw online today that a beautiful teenage boy killed himself last Friday, because he was gay and felt he had nobody, that is the last thing I want for my son, to feel alone like that. My heart cries for that boy because he was wrong, it DOES get better. We've mostly all been there, felt that pain, been bullied, and we got through it. I'm not making any judgement on his parents, my heart hurts for their loss, I just wish he knew they'd understand and would have done anything to help him. I've told my PJ since he was a toddler that there is nothing that the two of us cannot make it through, that I'm always in his corner, that I'd fight for him until the day I die and beyond. I mean I've pounded this into his skull over and over again and when in fifth grade he came to me because the bullying had gotten so bad he was considering suicide, he saw how fierce his mom is in defending him. At the end of that school year he had enough confidence to push the bully onto his ass and to tell him if he ever gets in his face again he'll get worse than being pushed onto his ass, the kid believed him and has not even looked at him wrong since. I cannot even allow myself to think what would have happened 2 years ago if he didn't know to come to me when he was being bullied because I'd help him, and I refuse to allow myself to go there. He made it through that. He doesn't care over much for Lady Gaga's music, a few songs here and there he likes, but he says he appreciates how she stands up for kids who are being bullied and how strong of a message she has for them. He's convinced she's saved more lives than she'll ever know about. I love Lady Gaga for fighting for kids like my son, who are bullied, and don't have someone in their corner to fight for them. Plus she makes some good, butt-wiggling music too!
So here's PJ, in 7th grade, taller than me with a voice as deep as his dad's. I look at him and am filled with pride, love and awe. I birthed me a beautiful baby boy who is turning himself into a spectacular human being and that I will not take responsibility for because whilst I may have laid the ground-work for it, he's done the hard work, made the right decisions and continues to try to be the best person he knows how to be. He doesn't care who sees him hug me in public, kiss my cheek in public and say I love you in public...I'm his mom and he loves me and wants the world to know it. How lucky am I?!!
04 October 2011
Fat Jokes are FUN!!!
These days decent people don't make fun of someone because of a disability, or their sexual orientation, or the colour of their skin...and that's good because you must really be a disgusting human being to do those things, but it's still not only acceptable but encouraged to make fun of fat people. Late night comedian's do it, tv sitcoms do it, drama's do it, everyone does it. It's cool, right? I mean it's not like people with weight problems have feelings or at least the don't have the right to have feelings you realise this, right? I mean fat people are only fat because they can't control themselves! Sure they all, every single one of them, just sits in front of a TV and shove food into their mouths! None of them have medical issues, none of them are on medication that cause weight gain, none of them have issues that they're dealing with because of something that happened to them or the fact that they're depressed, nah they just can't control themselves. Every single one of them fat asses just can't control shoveling in the food. The thing is? I'll bet most of the fat people that you know have one of those issues, if not more, that I just named, you just don't see beyond the fat. Like being gay, I don't think many (or any) people desire to be fat, they don't make a concerted effort to be overweight. I really can't picture a human being choosing to be fat, unhealthy and miserable. I think the miserable is the underlying issue as to why people are fat. There are people out there who are not having of a lot of money and see food as a reward so they over-eat but is that true or are they eating emotions? I think 99% of the time they're eating anger, depression, feelings of not being good enough because they're not having of the material possessions they deem worthy. I also think that it's not so much the material possessions they crave but something else, something deeper, they just don't have a way of figuring out what they really do need or they're so depressed they don't care.
So you have fat people who are fat because they eat emotions and lets face it, if you're miserable you're gonna eat good tasting food and maybe you can make broccoli taste good enough but it's never going to be as satisfying as ice cream. There are studies out there that say people do eat for comfort, that there are reactions in the brain and through out the body that tell us comfort food is needed and will be like a great, big hug. Who doesn't need a hug every now and then? Then realise that there are people out there who need not only that hug but even more and the only way they have of getting what they need is through food. I mean lets face it, we have to eat in order to live so we cannot avoid eating. Quite a large number of us are, at least part of the time, slaves to the taste buds and we want to put things in our mouths that taste good. There are good foods out there that are not harmful that taste good, fruits for one, but lets face it, they're not as plentiful or affordable as the bad, really good tasting stuff. That's another thing, the good-for-you-foods are usually quite a bit more expensive and some people just can't afford to buy a lot of them. I remember watching a show about how some of the poorest people in this country live on Mountain Dew and how it effects their health in a negative way that most of us who may drink that soda once in a while (personally I hate the stuff). It rots the teeth for one, it's so full of sugar and caffeine it's not even funny, it gives me heart palpitations just thinking about it. McDonalds is much more affordable than a regular, sit-down restaurant and kids are always begging to go there and how many actually order the salads they offer? Ok I do, and often, but I also get french fries 'cos lets face it, NOBODY makes french fries like McDonalds!
I know it all comes down to moderation, you can pretty much eat whatever you want as long as you eat it in moderation and you exercise. Again, if a person is depressed they're so not giving a shit about moderation or getting in a good workout, they just want that bag of potato chips. Stressed out people aren't going to go for a run after they eat a tub of ice cream. It's not about self control, it's about giving up. Yes, believe it or not there are folks out there who are so miserable they just don't care anymore, they've given up. They won't actively suicide but they'll eat themselves to death.
Then there are medications that either make you gain weight or make everything you put in your mouth taste bad, except for ice cream and cake. I know this as a fact, I've been on steroids for injuries and packed on the pounds and I've had medications that made even soda taste horrible, I could only eat spaghetti and ice cream, everything else made me vomit. I didn't have to be on those meds for a long time but they're only two examples and taking the weight off is always way harder than putting it on. Using myself again (as I'm overweight) as an example, I have no health insurance, I have no doctor so I am unable to get monthly blood tests to control an under-active thyroid. The summer of 2009 I tried to lose as much weight as I could for my upcoming trip to England. I've dreamt of going to England my entire life and the reason I was going was to see a band I'd dreamt of seeing live since 1984 (Spandau Ballet) but never got to because they never toured America. I did not want to go out there, meet all these wonderful people I'd met via the internet and see Spandau Ballet the way I looked so I got serious. I exercised, I ate nothing that tasted remotely like ice cream or chocolate and I made sure I snacked on healthy fruits and veggies. I worked out for an hour a day, six days a week. I walked for at least 45 minutes every day. I did this for over a month and ended up gaining 2 pounds. Talk about falling into a funk! All that for what? To GAIN weight? Sure it could have been muscle weight but I gotta say I honestly did not feel any better, no healthier, so I figured why continue. I let myself down. Which in turn depressed me even more. Now I have all these wonderful memories of the trip of a lifetime and it's drenched in shame. Because I looked horrible. Because society has made me feel that I'm worthless and have no self control. Most of the time I just ignore all that shit society puts on me, I don't think we all have to be super, model skinny, but some times its just impossible not to get down. I can't seem to lose weight because I'm not on medication to help control my thyroid. I can't afford medication or a doctor because I'm not insured. Of course that's another rant but it has a lot to do with a lot of problems in this country at this time. I'm not that unique that I'm the only one having this problem. My job is incredibly physically challenging, that alone should help keep me in some sort of shape but has absolutely no effect. Pulling and pushing hundreds of pounds, lifting heavy linens and bending and stretching and constantly walking for miles should have an effect but it doesn't. I have a great friend who's lost a lot of weight and she said once she got her metabolism working she was able to eat decent sized meals, enough to fill her up, and still continue to lose weight. That's my problem, my metabolism doesn't exist because the thyroid controls that, and mine doesn't work. But it's ok to make fun of me, to make jokes and to point and laugh, you see I have no self control. Even though I can diet, I can exercise and I can eat right but all to no or very little effect. But that's my fault. All my fault. Not really saying it's not but there are some things out of my control, like in this economy finding a job that will not only pay the bills but provide health insurance at the same time are just everywhere. ::sigh:: Oh well, I keep soldering on, what else can I do?
It's just shit that people still think it's ok to make fun of fat people when they don't know why those people are fat to begin with and even if it's from a lack of self control, even if it's from a strange desire to be fat, why does hurting someone make so many other people laugh? Even normally decent people, people who care about others and put their money where their mouths are, find it ok to make fun of fat people and I just don't get that. I'm even guilty of this! How gross is that! I guess it's true that most people in the world can only feel good about themselves when they put other's down. Really sad isn't it?
So you have fat people who are fat because they eat emotions and lets face it, if you're miserable you're gonna eat good tasting food and maybe you can make broccoli taste good enough but it's never going to be as satisfying as ice cream. There are studies out there that say people do eat for comfort, that there are reactions in the brain and through out the body that tell us comfort food is needed and will be like a great, big hug. Who doesn't need a hug every now and then? Then realise that there are people out there who need not only that hug but even more and the only way they have of getting what they need is through food. I mean lets face it, we have to eat in order to live so we cannot avoid eating. Quite a large number of us are, at least part of the time, slaves to the taste buds and we want to put things in our mouths that taste good. There are good foods out there that are not harmful that taste good, fruits for one, but lets face it, they're not as plentiful or affordable as the bad, really good tasting stuff. That's another thing, the good-for-you-foods are usually quite a bit more expensive and some people just can't afford to buy a lot of them. I remember watching a show about how some of the poorest people in this country live on Mountain Dew and how it effects their health in a negative way that most of us who may drink that soda once in a while (personally I hate the stuff). It rots the teeth for one, it's so full of sugar and caffeine it's not even funny, it gives me heart palpitations just thinking about it. McDonalds is much more affordable than a regular, sit-down restaurant and kids are always begging to go there and how many actually order the salads they offer? Ok I do, and often, but I also get french fries 'cos lets face it, NOBODY makes french fries like McDonalds!
I know it all comes down to moderation, you can pretty much eat whatever you want as long as you eat it in moderation and you exercise. Again, if a person is depressed they're so not giving a shit about moderation or getting in a good workout, they just want that bag of potato chips. Stressed out people aren't going to go for a run after they eat a tub of ice cream. It's not about self control, it's about giving up. Yes, believe it or not there are folks out there who are so miserable they just don't care anymore, they've given up. They won't actively suicide but they'll eat themselves to death.
Then there are medications that either make you gain weight or make everything you put in your mouth taste bad, except for ice cream and cake. I know this as a fact, I've been on steroids for injuries and packed on the pounds and I've had medications that made even soda taste horrible, I could only eat spaghetti and ice cream, everything else made me vomit. I didn't have to be on those meds for a long time but they're only two examples and taking the weight off is always way harder than putting it on. Using myself again (as I'm overweight) as an example, I have no health insurance, I have no doctor so I am unable to get monthly blood tests to control an under-active thyroid. The summer of 2009 I tried to lose as much weight as I could for my upcoming trip to England. I've dreamt of going to England my entire life and the reason I was going was to see a band I'd dreamt of seeing live since 1984 (Spandau Ballet) but never got to because they never toured America. I did not want to go out there, meet all these wonderful people I'd met via the internet and see Spandau Ballet the way I looked so I got serious. I exercised, I ate nothing that tasted remotely like ice cream or chocolate and I made sure I snacked on healthy fruits and veggies. I worked out for an hour a day, six days a week. I walked for at least 45 minutes every day. I did this for over a month and ended up gaining 2 pounds. Talk about falling into a funk! All that for what? To GAIN weight? Sure it could have been muscle weight but I gotta say I honestly did not feel any better, no healthier, so I figured why continue. I let myself down. Which in turn depressed me even more. Now I have all these wonderful memories of the trip of a lifetime and it's drenched in shame. Because I looked horrible. Because society has made me feel that I'm worthless and have no self control. Most of the time I just ignore all that shit society puts on me, I don't think we all have to be super, model skinny, but some times its just impossible not to get down. I can't seem to lose weight because I'm not on medication to help control my thyroid. I can't afford medication or a doctor because I'm not insured. Of course that's another rant but it has a lot to do with a lot of problems in this country at this time. I'm not that unique that I'm the only one having this problem. My job is incredibly physically challenging, that alone should help keep me in some sort of shape but has absolutely no effect. Pulling and pushing hundreds of pounds, lifting heavy linens and bending and stretching and constantly walking for miles should have an effect but it doesn't. I have a great friend who's lost a lot of weight and she said once she got her metabolism working she was able to eat decent sized meals, enough to fill her up, and still continue to lose weight. That's my problem, my metabolism doesn't exist because the thyroid controls that, and mine doesn't work. But it's ok to make fun of me, to make jokes and to point and laugh, you see I have no self control. Even though I can diet, I can exercise and I can eat right but all to no or very little effect. But that's my fault. All my fault. Not really saying it's not but there are some things out of my control, like in this economy finding a job that will not only pay the bills but provide health insurance at the same time are just everywhere. ::sigh:: Oh well, I keep soldering on, what else can I do?
It's just shit that people still think it's ok to make fun of fat people when they don't know why those people are fat to begin with and even if it's from a lack of self control, even if it's from a strange desire to be fat, why does hurting someone make so many other people laugh? Even normally decent people, people who care about others and put their money where their mouths are, find it ok to make fun of fat people and I just don't get that. I'm even guilty of this! How gross is that! I guess it's true that most people in the world can only feel good about themselves when they put other's down. Really sad isn't it?
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